Settling Into New Routines

Settling Into New Routines

I don’t know about you, but I’ve always been so grateful for the long Labor Day weekend that culturally marks the end of summer here in the Northern Hemisphere.  I love that it also coincides with the beginning of a new school year (usually within a week or two).  And whether your life still adjusts around a school year (being a mom, teacher, or student) or using Labor Day to re-set and ponder the last 90 days of the calendar year, you are likely shifting into new daily routines.  

This time of year is the perfect time to reset and reorganize ourselves into routines that support finishing the calendar year and feeling accomplished without feeling exhausted.  You know that exhausted feeling you have once the Holidays are wrapping up and you feel like you’ve been going 90 miles an hour with little to no sleep and little to no time for self-care.   

Creating purposeful morning and evening routines helps us manage school drop-offs, navigate extra traffic to work and home again, create earlier bedtimes, juggle kids’ activities, attend open houses, and yet still work in time for self-care, work, mom responsibilities, and even keep social time and fun in our lives.   But oh my, all that sounds so overwhelming!  

So…you pull out your calendar, planner, email inbox, and texts and start to fill in the blanks.  

Inevitably, when I get to this part I immediately start to feel like there are not enough hours in the day for all I want to accomplish.  Sound familiar?  

So I always ponder the question when the school year starts, how can I transition from a relaxed summer mindset to one of confidence, discipline, productivity, and yes, even leave some room for fun and the joy of living in the present?  

For me the answer lies in starting with answering the most important question:  What can I do now or daily that will make my life easier?  Your answer will be unique to you and your situation, but for me, I know I’ve always felt most grounded when I have a morning ritual for myself that feeds my soul and gives me space for spiritual practice, self-reflection, and some form of movement.  

Sounds like a lot to fit into a short period, but if I wake up when I tell myself I should, then it all runs smoothly.  The problem is, that waking up on time is 100% dependent on falling asleep on time so that I’m rested enough to stay consistently on point with my routine.  When I give up sleep time, I can sustain the morning routine for a few days or even a week.  But it comes at a terrible cost.  Quickly I fall off the wagon, take shortcuts that later I regret, start to feel exhausted which quickly leads to burnout, and before I know it self judgment, self-loathing, feelings of failure creep in quickly.  

This leads me to my 3 pillars for Focus and Executive Function:  Sleep, Study, and Select.  In that order, the 3-S system supports your goals, supports your journey, and helps remind you where you can quickly and easily jump back on the proverbial wagon.  

Sleep.  The magic number of hours for each of us is unique.  I used to be fine with 7 hours, but after my recent diagnosis with Grave’s disease, 8 hours feels much more necessary.   Science tells us that most healthy adults need 7-9 hours to function optimally the next day.  So whatever your magic number of sleep hours is for optimal health and mental well-being, cater your nighttime routine with sleep being your priority. 

Study.  Journal your thoughts, write your task lists, and fill in your calendar.  Then go back and study it daily, several times a day.  Without consistently studying your thoughts, goals, and reflection, you will easily lose sight of your goals and allow external distractions to pull you off course more easily.  

Select.  Select the most important habits that are going to make the rest of your life easier for you and choose to focus your energy there.  I recommend starting off focusing on just one root habit at a time.  You do not need to create a routine of 10 new habits to hone all at once.  Just select one per week or one per month if you’re slower to change like I am.  Making just one small adjustment at a time will yield monumental results in your life over time.  

As you settle into the last 90 days of the year, create morning and evening routines that are flexible and practice them.  It will take time, so please show yourself some patience and grace.  It’s not about perfection.  It’s about progress.  

Happy Labor Day!  

If you’re serious about finishing 2024 strong and are curious about how to work with me, shoot me an email, and let’s schedule a time to talk.  veronica@focusedmindcoach.com.  

I will work with you 1:1 to guide you to a new level of focus and productivity, spirituality, and better mental and physical health. 

Your Focus is a Product of Your Lifestyle

Do you ever feel mentally "in a fog?" Many people report that they often feel so mentally drained at some point in their day that they can no longer focus on things that really matter to them. This is especially frustrating when you're trying to reach new personal goals outside of the hours of your day that are devoted to someone else's goals/mission. But the good news is - You have the power to improve your brain's ability to focus and perform with greater mental sharpness throughout your day no matter the circumstance. You can improve your concentration and build your mental stamina. With your willingness and my guidance, together we can improve your focus in order to live the life you want.

Many believe that because they are diagnosed with ADHD, Anxiety, Depression, or simply have too many responsibilities in daily life, that they simply can't achieve staying focused. Carrying out daily responsibilities can seem daunting when you lack focus resilience. Organizing, prioritizing, and getting through day to day life efficiently seems like an impossible mission. It can even feel exhausting and leave one feeling mentally burned out at the end of every single day. Parents, professionals, students does this sound familiar?

The brain is designed like any other organ in our body. If we create habits to take care of it, it will get healthier, stronger, and become more resilient just like our muscles, our heart, our skin, our gut, and our immune system.

You can learn and incorporate these habits one by one over the course of 3, 6, or 12 months. In fact, the slower you build these habits, the more likely your are to stick to them. It takes practice. It may look messy at first. But it's not about achieving perfection, it's about improving the quality of your life - in a way that works best with your brain.

The good news is, the habits I'm referring to are all related to your basic needs - sleeping, eating, exercising, managing your energy (as opposed to managing time), single tasking (as opposed to multi-tasking), planning your simplest daily activities, and becoming more aware of your environment (both physical and social). Paying attention to these areas will improve how your brain works. And an efficient, working brain is a happy brain!

It may seem like I just listed a lot here, but don't fret. Together, I will walk you through how to break down each area of lifestyle in separate easy to read posts with small bites of digestible information to get you thinking and reflecting on areas in your life where you can alleviate your over burdened brain and welcome in a more calm, focused brain.

Happy reading!

Sleep for Laser Sharp Focus

Contrary to popular American attitude, sleep is NOT a luxury. Sleep is a physiological function even more necessary than eating at regular intervals. You can fast safely from solid food for days, even weeks. But try "fasting" from sleep. You're likely to suffer severe mood swings, volatile emotions, forgetfulness, heart palpitations, insatiable cravings for carbohydrates (hello diabetes!), dizziness, headaches, blurred vision, muscle aches, joint pain, even seizures. Every sleep specialist will tell you, If you're not sleeping enough at night you will not be on your "A" game the next day.

In fact, when I'm evaluating a patient for ADHD one of the most critical parts of the interview is asking about sleep. How much sleep are you getting at night? What's the quality of your sleep? Do you snore? Do you get up more than once in the middle of the night? Do you wake up feeling refreshed and restored? Do you toss and turn to try to get to sleep? Do you hit snooze 5 times or are you up on the first alarm? Do you need a nap in the afternoon because you feel you've hit wall?

All of these details matter. There's a reason we have a field of medicine dedicated to sleep. Sleep specialists may be pulmonologists, neurologists, psychiatrists, even endocrinologists and cardiologists are learning more about the clinical implications of healthy sleep. Do you know why? Because sleep affects every organ system of the body.

Many of my friends, co-workers, and family members view sleep as a sign of weakness or laziness. In Jay Shetty's recent book, Think Like a Monk, the author touches on the importance of sufficient sleep and how unfortunately, our "productivity driven society" encourages us to work more and sleep less and think that it's ok. He even quotes the writer Maria Popova, "We tend to wear our ability to get by on little sleep as some sort of badge of honor that validates our work ethic. But what it is, is a profound failure of self respect and of priorities." I agree 100%!

Sleep has always been important to me. In fact, if you read or listen to the author Gretchen Rubin, writer of Better Than Before, and host of the podcast "Happier", you know she has named herself a "sleep zealot." And I can so relate to that! I remember loving to sleep as a child. As an adult, I've also valued sleep through every stage of life - especially after the birth of my two beautiful kids.

Sleep more. Sleep better. Your mental clarity and focus will improve. Your energy will improve. Your mood will improve, and so will your resilience when life throws a wrench in your day.

So how can you improve the amount and quality of sleep?

I'm so glad you asked. Sleep doctors call it "good sleep hygiene." Here's what it includes:

*Turn off all electronics 1 hour before you want to fall asleep. That means anything with a screen: laptop, tablets, phones, TVs.

*Have a bedtime ritual that you stick to nightly. This may include a warm soothing shower, taking off your makeup, flossing, brushing, slathering on an aromatherapy lotion, slip in to soft comfortable sleep wear, keep a bed or journal with pen by the bed and read something fun (not news!) or write out what you want tomorrow morning to look like.

*Soft lighting in the bedroom. Warm lighting. Preferably on a dimmer, but a bedside lamp works fine if you're in a rental and you're not at liberty to install dimmers.

*Soft music. I like to ask Alexa to play "spa music." It brings relaxing music into my ambience.

*Make sure your room is dark and cool. Turn down the thermostat or use a fan to get the temperature comfortable.

*Wake at the same time consistently throughout the week. Sleeping in on the weekends is certainly ok now and then but it should never be more than. an hour later than your usual wake time.

*Keep daytime naps to a minimum and keep them early. A refreshing 10-20 minute cat nap can rejuvenate you, but certainly don't nap after 3 pm.

*Avoid caffeine after 3 pm.

*Avoid overindulging in food and alcohol late at night. One glass. of wine may be fine. to unwind, but any more than that is likely to interrupt your sleep and sure to cause unpleasant effects in the morning that sap your daytime energy.

*Exercise early in the day.

*Expose yourself to natural light during the day even for just 10-30 minutes/day.

Try these sleep hygiene habits for one week: log your sleep routine (before bed and upon arising). Be conscious of how you feel in the morning. Be conscious of what races through your mind at night. Aim for 7-9 hours as much as possible. Everyone has a different sleep threshold, but most healthy adults thrive in the range of 7-9 hours.

Let me know how your sleep project goes. Sweet dreams!

You can email me at: veronica@focusedmindcoach.com or leave a comment in the comments below. I can't wait to hear what you discover!